Patches, the Hyena

Lore

Patches the Hyena is a merchant and a thief. He wears black leather armor and wields an Adjudicator's shield and short spear. After encountering him in the cavern of Stonefang Tunnel or behind the sorcerer's altar in the Shrine of Storms, where he makes an attempt on the player's life, he can be found in front of the Tower of Latria archstone on the bottom level of the Nexus, where he sells rare, if overpriced, items.

Patches is a mischievous graverobber with a penchant for luring travelers to their deaths in order to loot their corpses. In the Stonefang Mine, Patches tricks the player into getting cornered by a bearbug, taunting the player that even if they kill the beast, the explosion is sure to get them. If the player survives, Patches remarks that the player is no joke.
In higher NG+ cycles, if Patches isn't out of the blast radius, the bearbug explosion can kill him.
In the Shrine of Storms, Patches' handiwork is seen long before he is. The player will encounter Graverobber Blige sitting in a partially flooded cell underground, and upon being freed will explain how he was trapped by Patches before opening his store to sell his wares.
After the Adjudicator fight, the player will find Patches hidden under the stairs behind the Reaper. Leaving an intriguing trail of glowing stones leading behind the stairs, Patches waits for the player beside a large hole, explaining that the pit below contains treasures that are ripe for the taking. As soon as the player gets close enough to the edge, Patches kicks the player squarely in the back, sending them plummeting into the depths to join the likes of Saint Urbain and a nasty Black Phantom. He calls after the player that he is looking forward to stripping the trinkets off the player's corpse, once they've starved to death, of course. His assault on Urbain leads Patches to be despised by Urbain and his followers. Though it seems this revulsion is mutual, as Patches comments on the greediness of the clergy, remarking bitterly that "Praying has not put food in my mouth, nor anyone else's." After you survive his traps and confront him, Patches will condescendingly ask forgiveness of you and attempts to laugh it off as a practical joke to save his own hide.

Theories

Patches' Name

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He is likely known as "the Hyena" for the inflection of his laugh. The character has its origins as a mech pilot named "Patch the Good Luck" in From Software's earlier game Armored Core: For Answer. In that game he is a mercenary piloting the mech "No Count" who gives up the fight if his master is killed, exclaiming "Wait wait! I give up! H-hey, I'm just following orders here! If he's pulled out, why should I…? Y-you guys, you're still alive right? This is No Count, come in! We're allies right? Right?" The character's in-game biography also details his favored combat strategy is to "snipe from the air or from concealed locations to catch his opponents off guard."

Dialogue

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First encounter (in Stonefang Tunnel):
"Oh, you're not mad like the rest, are you? Well, what jolly travelling companions are we? Pleased to meet you; call me Patches. Oh, see that treasure over there? Go on and take it! My gift to you, just to show that we're friends. Phew, I'm glad to meet you. These soul starved imbeciles will drive you mad."

In Stonefang Tunnel (if previously met):
"Oh, hello again. Hey, don't turn a cold shoulder. I didn't mean to do you wrong, really! O, I have an idea! That treasure over there should be mine, but I'll let YOU have it! I promise, no tricks! I won't move a muscle until the treasure's safely in your hands. You can trust me… can't you? I'm just trying to do right and make amends here, hmm? What's the matter? You're too good for treasure?"

• If you take the item: "Oh, oh!! Who'd have thought it? Bearbugs! My apologies, it's just not your day. As promised, the treasure is all yours. If you survive, that is! Good luck to you!"

After escape:
"You… How did you do that? I really didn't attempt to fool you. It was just bad luck. And besides, you're safe and sound, right? Worry not, worry not. Here it is, your little treasure, safe and sound. Go on. Take it, take it! Heh heh heh heh."

After escape (alternate):
"You… How did you do that? Worry not, the treasure is all yours! Tough luck with the Bearbugs, but you certainly showed them, didn't you? Here it is, the treasure, safe and sound. Go on. Take it, take it! Heh heh heh heh. Heh heh heh. You're simply unlucky. Worry not. Stay by me, and my luck'll rub off on you soon enough!"

If you kill the enemy instead of taking treasure:
"You… How did you do that?"

In Shrine of Storms (first encounter):
"Oh! the Demons haven't got to you, have they? I'm in luck. You see that pit? It's filled with treasure, but, er I can't get to it myself. Go on, have a look! It's more riches than I've ever dreamed of! That's it, that pit just there. Go on, get a little closer."

In Shrine of Storms (if previously met):
"Oh, hello again. Hey, don't turn a cold shoulder. I didn't mean to do you wrong, really! C'mon now, we've got better things to fret about! That pit there is filled with treasure, but, er I can't get to it myself. Go on, have a look! It's more riches than I've ever dreamed of! That's it, that pit just there. Go on, get a little closer. What's keeping you? Have a look at that treasure, down in the pit. Then we'll work out a way to fish it out. Heh heh heh heh."

• If you look into the pit: "Heh heh, don't hold it against me, eh? Take your time starving to death; then I'll sell every last trinket off your corpse! Keh heh heh heh!"

After escaping the pit:
"Y-you. Hey look, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean what I said. I mean, a man's got to make a living, right? Here, look I can make up for it. There aren't many humans like us. We need to stick together! I know! Here, take this, as a token of my friendship. You've seen one of these before, surely? Heh heh heh. C'mon, let's be friends, what do you say! No need to drag each other down."

In the Nexus (after any encounter):
"Well, I remember you. I'm glad I found you. I've found some really nice trinkets. Well, we've been long acquainted, so I'm willing to part with them at a special price, but only if you buy today! Nothing here is stolen, I swear. I no longer partake in the whole corpse-robbing thing. Yeah… No, I'm completely free from my vice. My old Mother would be proud indeed! Aren't you proud of me too?"
"I've not seen YOU of late. Heh heh heh, have I got some stuff for you! No, no, don't mention it! It's the least I can do for a dear friend! But do pay for them."

In the Nexus (after rescuing Urbain):
"You see that priest and his disciples over there? They still don't trust me after that little incident behind the altar. Shouldn't they believe in forgiving and forgetting and all that? Well, I have news for them. Praying has not put food in my mouth, nor anyone else's."

In the Nexus (after defeating two Archdemons):
"I have bad news. There's a rumour that the silent chief Yurt has infiltrated Boletaria. Yurt's a mercenary; he'd kill his own kin for the right price. Now, I'm not a saint, but compared to Yurt I'm as saintly as they come. So I implore you to stay away from Yurt, the assassin in black."

In the Nexus (after defeating three Archdemons):
"No no, don't mention it, it's the least I can do for a dear friend. But do pay for them! Did you ever visit the Valley of Defilement? The bog there is filled with the corpses of honourable knights too foolish to stay out of harm's way. You may have heard of some of them. Vito the Moonlight Knight, Risaia of Istarel, and many, many more. I reckon they left behind some fine armour and weapons. Why not have a visit… see what you can find?"

Upon leaving without shopping:
"Well, do as you please, but you may yet regret refusing my offer. Well, do as you please, but don't come a-crying when it works not. Fine, fine, fine, I cannot make you. Though I know you'll come back soon."

Upon leaving while talking:
"Hey, where are you off to?"

When attacked:
"You slimy little wretch! What did I ever do to you?"

Sources

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Black Leather
Glossy black leather clothes.
They function as thick skin, and offer protection without hindering the wearer's movement. They are especially good at resisting poisons.

Black Gloves
Black leather gloves.
They are impermeable to water, allowing one to perform dangerous work.

Black Boots
Black leather shoes that muffle footsteps.
Used by thieves and assassins who need to stay hidden in the shadows. Either way, they are not used for good.

Saint Urbain Dialogue
Heavens, did you fall for that little devil's trap?
Well, I did the same. He fooled me, and now I am stuck here.

Acolyte of God Dialogue
I swear that I will catch that blasted Hyena some day soon.
He fooled me, and kicked the Honourable One down a trap door behind the altar of a shrine.
…
Do you have any connection to Patches the Hyena?
I trust not. He is a depraved, vile man, and he deserves no allies.
I hope that an upstanding hero such as yourself is selective when making associations.

Graverobber Blige Dialogue
Heavens, I can't believe I fell for that trap. I suppose I owe you now.
…
There's somebody I ought to warn you about. A fellow who lacks common decency.
They call him Patches the hyena, and he's the one that laid that trap for me.
He's the kind of person who'd stab his mother in the back.
If you happen to spot him, you'll be doing us all a favour by putting him out of his misery.

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NEXT: Sage Freke, The Visionary

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